Shopping, Seniors And Santa

Well unless you live in a cave or are in Mexico on vacation you know we got a lot of snow recently. Friday night I went to bed and the streets were clear not a flurry or flake in sight. But on Saturday morning the word was out it was going to be a snow flake reunion and everyone was invited. By the time it was done they were packed in 14" deep. Well I got up on Saturday did some laundry got dressed cleaned off my Jeep and headed out. I was going to meet freinds to shop for a retirement home. We decided to do that instead of having a secret Santa exchange, I guess I'll have to wait one more year for that Cledus T Judd CD. Anyway I arrived at my friend Ang's house and when I asked if we were still going shopping she replied in a nice way, NO! I said "Hey I have 4 wheel drive." And she became a little more willing. When I called the third member of our shopping tour de force, Kim and asked her why she wasn't there yet she asked "Are you insane?!" Well after a little convincing Ang & I headed off to Ephrata. We picked up Kim and headed for K-Mart. We found some good bargains even though we forgot the condoms. In this retirement home there is 1 man and 21 women, I;m just saying. We then went to Dollar Tree and I found out that they are the upper crust of dollar stores. We made out pretty good there too. We needed some poinsettias so we headed for Esbenshade's and the Christmas miracle part of our story. When we arrived the place was closed. I saw that the door to the wholesale dept was open and ran in to check it out. After pouring on the charm, showing a nice smile and assuring the lady these flowers would not end up on the black market she let us in. Now by let us in I mean they let us into the greenhouse, alone, to pick out our poinsettias. Well we grabbed 22 nice flowers, and said a quick prayer for the one that Kim killed. We checked out and were on our way. The trip back to Kim's was made a little difficult by the windows being fogged up. Ang said either my defogger sucks or she is full of hot air. Seeing as how I only had the center console between us I said no comment. Although if you know Ang I'll let you be the judge. We got back and put the gifts in bags with tissue paper, and then had lunch. I found out some things at lunch; 1)Yogurt is not cheese, 2)Cream cheese is cheese, 3)England was cancelled for a while, 4)Though that last one may have been Christmas was canceled for a while in England & 5)Spray cheese is not in the top 5 cheeses in the US though we all feel it should be. Well I took Ang home then after shoveling myself a space at my house relaxed inside.

On Sunday I met Ang and Dave and we headed up to Ephrata. Although not right away sometimes starting my Jeep is a two person operation. We got to Kim's loaded up the gifts and tried to leave. Again I had trouble starting my Jeep. And I gave up I told them go ahead I have to get this fixed, as I said that I turned the key it started and off we went. On the way we decided that for some women tarantulas are a deterrent to relationships. We also decided that for all men cat strollers offer the same deterrent. We arrived at Cornwall Manor and delivered gifts to the delight of the residents. Though some were dreaming they were delighted. Then we went to Red Robbin for dinner and Ang finally decide to call Jacqui. The 5 of us went to Christmas Candy Lane looking forward to a good time. But that plan was put on hold when Jacqui's Mini (Mobile If Not Inclement weather) got stuck in the parking lot. Ten minutes, 4 wet gloves and three of Kim's teeth later the car was free. We got inside and had a lot of fun at the Claw, the Bumper Cars, seeing Reindeer, the Pirate Ship, drinking hot chocolate (for pushing a car) and of course the Merry Go Round. Am I forgetting anything...Oh yeah; THE TRAIN! Last year we had the Turnpike ride that you DO NOT want to miss. This year was the Train. We rode the train 3 times. Was it that exciting? Not really. But on the first ride I noticed a figure of a woman in white lights with an out of place red light on her breast. I mentioned this to the group and they said there is no way that was true. So we rode it again. Now Ang decided there had to be a wager on this. I said I was so confident that if I was wrong I would sit through "The Sound of Music". They lept at the chance and agreed without knowing my movie. Well when we got to the lady in almost all white Ang was strangely silent. I could tell she was trying to come up with some explanation but maybe the cold had slowed her down a bit. Kim just said "Yup it's on her boob". Even though Rudolph hiding in her jacket or a red tipped ski pole sound good. Then we rode the train again this time trying to capture the woman on film. No luck though. Well we finished up and headed home. Well we did, Jacqui may still be in the parking lot. So thanks to Kim, Ang, Dave, Jacqui, Cornwall Manor, Kim's Grandma, K-Mart featuring Michael, Dollar Tree, Esbenshade, Red Robin and Hershey Park for a wonderful 2 days. Oh and of course God for the great layer of snow. Now I just have one question what am I going to have the girls watch for my movie? Any suggestions?